rakarth (rakarth) wrote,
rakarth
rakarth

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Past My Bedtime

White Rabbits! New month, gotta get me some LUCK!

YEAH!! WHAT!? OOOKAAAY!!!!!

Luck however, came at an inconvenience to Ben already this month. Getting into his car in the late afternoon, Ben noticed his vision obscured. For centuries, getting covered in bird shit has been precursory to good luck (citation needed). Ben may have even got a touch of good luck but one thing is for sure, he got a greater portion of CRAP-O-VISION (See: 1). 'Whatever,' thought Ben, 'I can outsmart this piece of crap.' The blades of the window wipers mixed with a stream of water attacked the foreign object.

It smeared (See: 2).

Have I ever told you I hate liquorice? A combination of things really has it set permanently in my 'disrespect' column. Firstly, it's hard to spell. I took me a few minutes to find out the right letters, and then some extra time finding out the correct way they go together to form the freaking word. It also tastes bad. Smell is also a factor, I don't think it smells too good. Coffee on the other hand, I love the smell of. But not so keen on the taste. Uh..

So Bebo's blog system is pretty half-assed. Can't add pictures or links, and if you can? Well it damn well isn't very obvious to me. It's as if God only made half a donkey during the creation of the world. Like, cut down the middle, from his nose to his bum. Fuck knows how that would move. Noah would have had to pray for some Anti-Stress tablets trying to get that thing on his massive Ark. It would have to waddle sideways I reckon, like a crab, except with only two legs. That's a pretty HALF-ASSED thing you did God. Ahaha. What a bastard!

I hit my funny bone when I was coming down a ladder. Remember when you could hit it and there was just pins and needles? Hell, that's probably all it's supposed to do. I must be hated by my arms. Pain got shot straight up through me forearm and settled in the side of my palm. No one seemed to care. I was alone.

Not to be outdone, the other inanimate objects at work must have put some money down on who could get me next. The tape measure succeeded by cutting into my middle finger. Kinda like a paper cut really. It also hurt. They say things happen in threes, so I'm a bit nervous wondering what will happen next. But just know....


You'll hear it here first!!


CRUNK!!!
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